Day 5 of the new year. Now it's real.

Kids are back in school. It's time to take the decorations down and get back to doing work (as opposed to spending the day talking about what we did over the holidays).

It's time to get back on a schedule. Get on track to feel better and to accomplishing things so that when we're ringing in 2017, we look back and say, "2016 was a great year!"  Wouldn't that be awesome?

To be healthy and productive, we need to make plans and take action. But, that's not always so easy, is it? I don't think so. It may take time to decide what you really want, who you want to be, and how you're going to achieve these things.

If you're still figuring it out, keep the following things in mind. I point them out because they are things I struggle with. Things I have to remind myself. I’m sure you’ve heard them before and they may seem obvious, but as Brendon Burchard (one of my mentors) says, “Common sense isn’t always common practice.” So, they bear repeating and thinking about.

• Don't compare yourself to others. Not your body, your career, your relationships, your successes, your challenges, your goals. Decide what will make YOU happy.
• Don't look back to determine your path forward. Your past may have shaped who you are, but it does not define your future. And, it really is not too late to change course.
• The things that reap the greatest rewards often seem the most scary, overwhelming, time-consuming. But, don’t cross them off your list of goals too quickly. Consider the rewards, the best-case scenario. Scary and overwhelming doesn’t mean you can’t do it or that it’ll kill you. And, the time will pass anyway. What else are you planning to do with that time? Will it result in great fulfillment?
• Don’t let yourself become paralyzed with indecision. This is one I really fight. I know it stems from wanting to be perfect. And, yes, I know no one is perfect. And, I know there usually isn’t a right and a wrong decision—nothing is so black & white. And, as my mother has told me since I was a child, “To not decide is to decide.” Yes, I know. Just pick something. Make it work. Or, don’t make it work. Fix it. Or, don't fix it. Learn from it and move on.

We want this to be our best year yet, right? Then we've got to make plans, take action, and possibly get out of our own way. I know you can do it. Let's make 2016 the year we all achieve great things :)

Hello December!

December, you snuck up on us—AGAIN!

This is often a stressful time of the year. Suddenly we're struck by how fast the year went and how little time is left. We think about the things that we had planned to do but didn't this year. We think about all the things we need to do before Christmas. We feel overwhelmed.

We need to decorate, buy gifts, wrap gifts, buy new clothes for the parties we'll be attending. We need to grocery shop, cook, and bake. We need to create and send out holiday cards, finalize holiday plans, make an appearance at the kids' school, volunteer at church or local charity, and remember to move that damn elf EVERY night.

We know that something's got to give this month and it's probably going to be our well-being. We accept that. This time of the year is crazy. We don't have time to workout and there are too many tempting foods and drinks to consume. We're stressed and not getting enough sleep. We tell ourselves that we'll just "get through the holidays" and get back on track after the new year.

That's one route to take. It's the route most of us take every December. What if we took a new route this year? Not a COMPLETELY different route, but one that doesn't let us get so far off track.

Each night, make a list of what you need to do the next day. Pick out the top 3 that MUST get done. You have more than three each day? I know; me too. But, do YOU have to all of them? Can you divide tasks with your spouse, sibling, friend? 

What about your kids—are they old enough to do some chores that will alleviate what you need to do? This is the perfect time to get them to help out, as they are anticipating getting rewarded for being "good" in just a few weeks. 

Yes, they will most likely not load the dishwasher, clean up their room, fold the laundry, etc. as you would have. But, guess what? Those are NOT things that need to be done perfectly. Those are not things you need to worry about now (if ever). Do NOT redo what they have done sub-parly. Next time, give them more specific directions or give them another task to do. 

Focus on your priorities, get them done & you'll feel so much better getting into bed. You'll feel much more productive and less stressed than if you had spent the day doing those little tasks and still had the big things hanging over your head.

Do NOT put yourself at the bottom of the priority list each day! Make sure you take care of your health. You'll be even MORE stressed if you get sick and can't do anything on your list! You can do small things: drink lots of water, get enough sleep, stretch or do a short workout.

The next 30 days are going to go by quickly, but they don't need to be a chaotic blur. Stay focused, enlist support and ring in the new year with a smile rather than a sigh of relief :)

Don't Wait to Ask Important Questions

There's nothing like a health problem (or even just a scare) to make you seriously think about (and regret) all the things you might have done (or didn't do that you should have) to have caused you to be in the situation you now face.

You think about the bad foods and drinks you've consumed. You curse yourself for having ever tried a cigarette. You remember all the times you decided to not workout when you could have.

You think about you're odds of being ok. When I was in college, there was a PSA running that said one out of eight women would get breast cancer. At the time, I lived with seven other girls. That meant one of us would get it.

Last month I had a mammography. A few days later I received a call that I needed to come back for additional scans. I was told this wasn't necessarily bad news and I shouldn't panic. I took the woman at her word because I know this isn't uncommon.

Today I went in for the additional scans. When I got into the room with the technician, she had images up from my last two mammograms. She pointed at dots and shaded areas that she said were different on my two previous scans. I started to feel nervous.

I had the additional scans and then went into a waiting room with six other woman. I thought about that PSA and wondered if my odds had gotten better or worse. Odds were that one of us was going to get bad news. I thought about my mother, and other women I knew who had breast cancer.

I got called in for a third round of scans. When I returned to the waiting room after that, there were only two other women left. My odds were getting worse.

It had actually been two years since my last mammogram. I didn't get one last year. Why? Why didn't I make the time? Was I working? Shopping? Looking at Facebook? Walking my dog? What was so important that I couldn't make the time to make sure I am healthy? Was it that I workout and eat well and think I'm invincible? Was it inconvenient? Did I not think it was important?

As panic sets in, you start to make deals with God / the universe / yourself. You promise if you're ok you'll give up soda / booze / cigarettes / partying / staying up late; you'll exercise; you'll change your diet; you'll do the things we know we're supposed to do but don't.

Next, I got called in for an ultrasound. A nice technician took me into the room and complimented me on my shoes. She took quite a while to do the procedure. When she was done, she started talking about my shoes again and I knew I was in trouble. She said the doctor would be in soon.

The doctor and technician returned together and said the doctor was going to redo the ultrasound. Me and my shoes needed to stay a while longer. No surprise.

Afterwards I sat waiting to meet with the doctor to discuss what they saw. I started to think about how my life would change if I had breast cancer. Would I act differently? Would I change my habits?The things I'm pursuing? The things I'm not pursuing? Who I'm spending time with?

These are such important questions—questions that we should ask ourselves NOW. If you knew you had limited time left, what would you do? What would you stop doing? What would you wish you had done? How would you change? Who would you spend time with? The answer to those questions should help bring clarity about what's important to you and what you should focus on.

As for me, I'll be going through an ultrasound again in six months to look at some "suspicious lumps". But, I'll be thinking about those questions this weekend and working on making any changes necessary to lead me to a life that will end with minimal regrets—I hope you'll do the same.

Surround Yourself with the Right People for Success

What if your best friends were Bill Clinton, Bill Gates, Richard Branson, Mark Zuckerberg & Oprah Winfrey? Do you think your life would be different?

What if your best friends were Lindsey Lohan, Miley Cyrus, Kanye West, Lamar Odom & Charlie Sheen? Do you think your life would be different then?

Motivational speaker Jim Rohn famously said that we are the average of the five people we spend the most time with. Think about who those people are for you. They have a huge impact on your life.

They may be your friends, family, co-workers, people you’re on a committee with, parents of your children’s friends, people in a class you’re taking,

All of these people can affect what you eat, where you go to eat, what you wear, if you workout, how you workout, what you do in your free time, your spending habits, what books you read, what activities you have your kids do, your mindset, how successful you are.

If you think about it for a few minutes, I bet you’ll come up with a dozen examples to support this. I think about being in college, living in a suite with 7 other girls. We wound up spending our free time together, eating the same things, wearing the same clothes, watching the same tv shows, joining the same clubs.

Quite frequently, I see how people’s health is affected by their family and friends. I have a client who needs to lose well over 100 pounds. His wife also needs to lose weight, but isn’t taking any action to do so & seems to be sabotaging his weight loss efforts. He’s scheduled to workout with me after work. His wife often makes plans for them to go out to dinner when we are scheduled to workout. Also, he goes upstairs after dinner to avoid being by the kitchen and tempted to eat more. His wife bakes cookies & brings them up to him after he has gone upstairs.

I have another client whom I see in the morning. Recently, she and her friend planned to go into the city for the day. Her plan was to workout and then go into the city. When she arrived for her session, she said her friend was giving her a hard time and was trying to get her to cancel her training session even though she had time to workout before they left. She said it’s hard for her because her friends don’t exercise & they are always trying to get her to blow off working out.

I think about my group of friends. They all exercise. When we’re making plans, working out is often mentioned. If we’re doing something on a Saturday, someone might say, “I’m running a race in the morning” or “I’m taking 9:30 spin class, so by the time I get home, shower & change, I can meet at noon”. Or, when making plans after work, “I want to go for a quick run when I get home, so let’s meet at 8”. We expect exercise to be a part of each other’s schedules. We support it.

We can also be affected by other people’s eating & drinking habits. Again, college life comes to mind. I have memories of people being cheered on to do shots and eating junk food late night.

And, for some reason, people like to push desserts on others. Have you ever tried to say “no thanks” to a piece of birthday cake? People are adamant that you have a piece of their birthday cake. “It’s my birthday! You have to have a piece of cake!”

People you hang out with can affect your mood. When I was working in marketing, I dealt with vendors. There were 2 guys we mainly used for the same thing. One of them was a total downer. Whenever we spoke & I asked “how are you?”, he would sigh & complain about something. The other guy was the exact opposite. When I asked him how he was, he always said, “I’m great!” with much enthusiasm. I knew he wasn’t always great, but he always said he was. And, it always struck me how much nicer it was to talk to him than the other guy.

Think about the 5 people you spend the most time with. Do they have healthy habits? Do they enrich your life? Are they happy? Are they successful? Do you respect them?  

Think about your ideal self—the person you try to be daily, and the one you are working towards becoming. Do the people you surround yourself with support your efforts?  Do they encourage you to take action to become better?

If you answered "yes" to all, great! You’re hanging with the right people!

If you answered "no" to any of the questions, you need to find people who will help you be the best you. There are plenty of them out there! They may not live next door, but there are groups for just about anything these days. And, with social media, it's easy to find like-minded people.

I work alone but want to connect with other people who share my enthusiasm for helping people lead healthy lives, so I attend conferences and join groups on social media with people who share my interests. People post information, questions, struggles, and total strangers responded with answers and support – it’s great! 

There are supportive people out there for you to connect with, it doesn’t matter where you live! You just need to find those people! 

Remember: you are the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with. It’s worth your time and effort to make sure you surround yourself with the right people—people who will help you be your best.

What's Important

Tuesday was my 14th wedding anniversary. As I do every year, I looked through photos of what was probably the best day of my life, with mixed emotions.

I see photos of people I'm no longer in contact with, people who have gotten divorced, and people who have died. But, those faces, on that day—along with those of my friends, family, husband and mine—were filled with love, laughter and happiness.

Our wedding took place just 4 days after September 11, 2001. Every one of our guests was affected by the tragedy, but they managed to open their hearts to celebrate our union and life that day. I felt blessed to be alive, in love, and surrounded by people I cared about.

Tragedy usually puts things in perspective. It makes us think about what's really important, what's really NOT important, and what we take (or took) for granted.

After a tragedy or bad diagnosis, we tell our family that we love them, hug them a little longer, and appreciate what we have. We are kind and patient when we otherwise wouldn't be. We have no interest in drama or the people that create it. Superficial things lose meaning. We are mainly concerned with health, well being and basic necessities.

Then, time passes.

Things start to annoy us again. The show we set to record got cut off; our internet is slow; we didn't make it through the light because the driver in front of us wasn't paying attention; the woman in front of us at the grocery store is taking time to look through her bag for exact change; the train was delayed—again.

There are a thousand things every day that we COULD focus on, get distracted by or annoyed about. But, if we are CLEAR about what we want and how we want to interact with others, then we can focus on what's important.

That clarity not only gives us a sense of purpose and identity, but helps guide the decisions we make each day. As choices are presented to us, we can ask ourselves questions like "Will this lead me closer to my goal?", "Is this how I want to express myself?" or simply, "Is this important to me?"

Take some time to think about what's REALLY important to you, the future you want, and how you want to present yourself. It may take time, discipline and work to figure it out and keep it in mind but, with rewards such as satisfaction and joy, I'm pretty sure you'll find it worth it :)

Living a High Performance Life: INFLUENCE

The fifth area of high performance is influence.

No man is an island, as the saying goes. You may have brilliant ideas, but if you don't get support from others, they probably won't ever come to fruition. You need to have influence over your family, friends, co-workers, and possibly strangers to accomplish your goals.

We use influence for little things in our daily lives—to get friends to try a new restaurant; to get your family to go to a movie you want to see.

Think about the person who has had the most influence over you. Why was that person able to influence you? Keep those qualities in mind as you think about an area you'd like to have more influence.

Living a High Performance Life: PRODUCTIVITY

The fourth area of high performance is productivity. Being highly productive is being consistently focused and effective, which means being good at minimizing distractions and maintaining priorities.

There are so many distractions in our lives today and we've been taught that multi-tasking is a good thing. Well, studies have shown that multi-tasking is NOT a good thing. It makes you LESS productive at each of the things that you are trying to do. You can effectively get more done by FOCUSING on 1 thing at a time.

Think about a time when you were being really productive. What were you doing?

I think back to when I was making a career change to become a personal trainer. I had very little time outside my corporate job, but I made very good use of it. I was focused & excited about becoming a trainer; I made becoming a trainer a priority, and I worked really hard at it.

Think about where you are not being productive enough right now. What's the difference between your time of high productivity and now?

What can you do to get back to high productivity?

You may need to re-adjust your priorities; block off time on your schedule; or take steps to eliminate or remove yourself from distractions. This may be a challenge, but in the end, you'll wind up less stressed, getting more done, and feeling better about the way you spend each day :)